Thursday, April 2, 2009

The silent voices that scream in my head.

Where is it that I start and others end?
Where is it that others end and I start?
Who decides?
Life?
Times?
Circumstances?
I believe it's me. I decide. I control. I live. I hurt.

Why do we build walls to protect our core?
When we let some in, why does it always hurt?
Why can't we phrase the most important in words?
Why do people encroach each other's space?
Since, when does the other, the outside become more significant than the inside?
I think I still live in the simple world, where what matters is my intent, my will, my strength.

All that I hear from every one around and beyond is about the others. Why?
I am the source and I am the sink.
If I don't exist the world won't for me.
Why can't any one see the simple truth?
I can't make any sense out of any one. It's like I live in world where I know not a soul and not a soul knows me.

It's I who weaves my abstract thoughts in actions. Actions propelled from my core. Not from some one else's core.
I eat the food. I digest it. I shit it. Not any one else.
Why is it so difficult to understand to realise that if you think you exist. If there is not iota of I in you. There's nothing in you.

Where ever I see. All I see is people driving their insides to meet the outsides. Squeezing, tweezing, bruising to please, to appease, to fit in the so called "outside".
Why?

I believe life is simple. Simple and we complicate it when we forget us and remember others. When we give other's more priority over us. I never do any thing for any one else. I live for myself. I am not ashamed of it.
I do things that please me. It gives me happiness to see my parents happy. I make them happy to make me happy. I don't squeeze me to make them happy. If I do that I can't last long. There's only a limit to which I can squeeze. Only a time till when I will juice then I will dry. I will burn out. And then drained and burned I will curse, I will lash out, I will depress myself and others.

Is it so difficult to see?

2 comments:

man in painting said...

like trillion tiny mirrors the neurons reflcts the "i"...
very nice..
voices so true..
wishes..
take care..

Saurabh Sinha said...

There is a fine line that seperates selfishness with self.You have boldened the fine line.......
Very careful thoughts....